This is me as a South Park character. Click here to get your own.

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Don’t buy things you can’t afford.

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This would be funny if it weren’t true.

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We all get them, we all delete them almost immediately, we all wish they would stop. Email forwards. Email forwards can take several forms. They typically are the little emails that friends and family receive and pass onto all their friends.

Titles range from:
Top ten reasons to…
Pray for [insert cause] please…
Chain letters, which end something like “pass this onto 5 friends now and you’ll have good luck for the next 10 days”…
Unbelievable photos…
Poems…
Etc…

Well, last week I received three which were absolutely great.

1. The first comes from my dear friend Dawn Brinkley. The email is titled How the Phone Should be Answered.

GOOD MORNING, WELCOME TO THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA .
Press “1″ for English.
Press “2″ to disconnect until you learn to speak English

And remember only two defining forces have ever offered to die for you, Jesus Christ and the American Soldier. One died for your soul, the other for your freedom.

If you agree…! …keep it going.

2. The second comes from my father. He sent me an email exchange we had nearly 10 years ago. (although I’m curious if my brother Matt actually did the forwarding.)

TIME
Always in a hurry, wanting to have some time.
Can’t keep up the flurry, but can’t stop to unwind.
The bill are there, and the deadlines too;
I pray to God, what can I do.
My wife, my kids, and others need me,
But most of all, my God and I,
Just need some time, for us, to be free.

3. The third one was a simple image sent to me by my buddy, Will Riney.
This made me chuckle.

Which made me think of this little image. This one actually hits too close to home when I’m visiting my folks.

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